Imperfect 10

Howdy again folks. I'm pretty much memed out, but Poetikat tagged me to do this one and I'm gonna go ahead and do it because it's kinda related to my regular schtick: Revealing Mysteries.

These are personal Mysteries. It's a list of 10 things about me that nobody knows. (Well, almost nobody - Mrs. Doodlius knows everything.)

So, no Mytery of the Universe today, and instead it's 10 Mysteries of a tiny little corner of the Universe known as Baba Doodlius. So without further ado, here are

10 Mysterious Things about the Great and Powerful Baba Doodlius

---

1) I introduced Kermit the Frog to the concept that "It Isn't Easy Being Green". And he never gave me credit for it.


Ungrateful frog. Never trust a frog that's not being served to you in a French restaurant.

2) I invented the feather duster. It was an accident, really - I got my ass stuck under the fridge. Icky!

3) I love eggs. Eggs are yummy! Poached, especially.

4) I once fought and destroyed a cyborg from the future.


He looked all cute and fuzzy until you saw the robotic endoskeleton. He was tough, but nothing I couldn't handle. He won't be back!

5) I set the world record* for "most wooden blocks chewed up in one hour" in 1969. It still stands. Take that, macaws!


Macaws get all the press because of their colorful feathers, but I can beat the best of 'em in a wood chewing contest!

6) My brain is larger than the dimensions of my head. It only fits in there due to an anomaly in the space-time continuum.

7) I am the Universal Master of Bird Fu. Actually, I alluded to this little factoid once before, but never revealed that I am, in fact, the Universal Master. Bird Fu was how I defeated the cyborg from #4, above; I used the deadly "Crouching Parrot" technique. You shoulda seen it, it was epic!

8) I once painted my toenails. Purple. I think it was because of the Oxycontin. Whoops, said too much.

9) I was an uncredited backup singer on the song "Postcards from Paraguay", on Mark Knopfler's 2004 album "Shangri-La". I'm great with harmony!


Mark Knopfler is cool, and can really play that guitar. He isn't as much into parrots as Jimmy Buffett, though.

10) I hate spiders. What with the Bird Fu and all, I know I could take 'em, but the thought of them crawling over my beak while I'm sleeping totally gives me the willies. You know what I'm talking about!


So there you have it. Ten Mysterious things about me that you always wanted to know. Or not. Whatever, I did the meme.

Have a nice day!



* There is an unfortunate asterisk on my wood-block-chewing world record. I used a performance-enhancing substance: titanium beak implants. Hey, they weren't illegal at the time!