post-foo The Thoughts and Sayings Of Baba Doodlius: Cluck This

Thursday, November 1, 2007

Cluck This

Greetings all you hamsters on the spinning exercize wheel of Truth! Baba Doodlius here, with this week's Revelation of another Mystery of the Universe!

I'm sure you think of me as a tenacious, hard-working champion on a never-ending quest for Truth, but in reality I am basically a lazy bastard. So I'm not going to do any work whatsoever this week. Rather, I have a Special Guest Blogger who has done all of the work for today's Revelation and as such will also be writing all the copy.

So without further ado, and because I'm tired from even having to type a few sentences, I am happy to introduce to you my good friend and Special Guest Blogger

Buckirk McGurk


Howdy Blog Readers! I'm Buckirk McGurk, and my ol' buddy Baba Doodlius has asked me if I'd like to do a blog entry for him this week. Well shucks, Baba, that'd be just fine with me!

Baba tells me that he does this blog about all the Secrets of the Universe that everbody wants to know but just don't ask fer whatever reason. Well I have somethin' to contribute to Baba's little encyclopedia here, seein' as how I know a secret that people DO ask now and again. And that would be

Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

And in case you were wonderin', NO, I'm NOT gonna discuss that novelty T-shirt with the chicken and the egg humpin' each other. That would be just plain silly, and this is a completely serious blog.

Now I know some of you are gonna get all smart-alecky and start talkin' about how lots of old-timey critters laid eggs

Yes, dinosaurs laid eggs you smart-aleck varmints.

Well you think you're so smart, but we're talkin' about chickens and chicken eggs here, consarnit! I had a theory of my own here I wanted to look into, and I just so happen to have access to all Baba's super-duper high-tech time travellin' equipment that he uses to go back in time and prove his theories. So I went all the way back in time, to the absolute beginning, and got a picture of the the start of time as you know it (pretty slick, eh? Baba's got some seriously neat stuff here at the ol' nest, lemme tell ya). Yep, I'm talkin' about the Big Bang! I got a picture o' that!

And my picture proves my theory of which came first beyond any doubt:

It was a chicken what started the whole Big Bang itself! The Cosmic Chicken laid the whole Universe!

Now that y'all know that you owe your entire existence to the Cosmic Chicken, you might have a little more respect for us chickens, and stop eatin' so darned many of us! And Baba, thanks for lettin' me set all these good people straight about that whole chicken-egg Mystery. Have a good 'un!


Well, Buckirk, that was, uh, enlightening, I guess. I won't even try to fathom how the Cosmic Chicken got there. Anyway, I hope you folks enjoyed today's guest blogger, but from now on I think I'll just get off my lazy, feathered butt and write my own updates fer cryin' out loud.

Cosmic Chicken?!? Where the hell did he get that from? Bajeebers!


Elise said...

LOL that has got to be the most intersting thing about chickens i have ever read!

imac said...

The whole Universe, laid by a chicken.WOW

Cooper said...

All I know is when combined they make a damn fine chicken salad sandwich!!!!

Kathleen said...

Have you never seen on a clear night when the moon is full, the constellation Pullam Gallinam Cosmos? It's right next to the Big Dipper, you can't miss it. In a leap year, you often see the formation jump into the big pot!

Stop by to see todays new poem.

Alex the Cat said...

I don’t know’ about eggs, but I do like to hunt birdies but don’t tell my human ‘cause he thinks I just like to hunt mousies. OK?

Delirious said...

I'm glad you straightened me out, I thought the egg salad sandwich came first...

Marja said...

Oh didn't know i lived on an chicken egg That's interesting

moooooog35 said...

Colonel Sanders is SO in Hell if this is true.

..and wouldn't it be called the "Big Bok" or the "Great Lay?"

i beati said...

all I kno wis no other blog makes me laugh a and wonder at the same time . Noone noone entertains me more than toi !!! it ends at i . don't go there.. sk

nardstar said...

i wonder if i can make omelet from the stars from the Big;p

The Oswegan said...

I had a big bang like that last night at the high school orientation during the middle of the presentation.

I just looked ashamedly over at my son and pretended that he did it.


Tequila Mockingbird said...

mmmm i think i want some KFC tonight. do you know how the Colonel knew for sure he was drunk? he couldnt taste the chicken.

Monday Morning Power said...

Oh the power of a chicken. I'm always learning from you.
BTW, I just put up a new site. Take a look "Be the first to complain."

Kathleen said...

Dearest Baba,

Haven't heard from you in a while...stop by and check out my latest...pretty unusual stuff.


Kathleen said...

Thanks for checking in, Baba. I'm sure if I had dated you, you would never have treated me badly. (I'm really a nice person, honest - I just have times where my brain crosses over to the dark side.)


[Un]Censored said...

The entire universe laid by a chicken...

I dig it.

It could be worse...the Bible could be right!


Anonymous said...

I'm glad you cleared all that up for me...I can rest easy now.

Linda and her Surroundings said...

Baba, I would never eat a chicken or any other feathered creature.

Your big bang theory is an easier one to manage than Stephen Hawking's. At least I can understand yours!

Doctor Rick said...


That chicken and big bang theory blowed me away! It makes a lot of sense.

lin said...